MM013 – Desire or Deserve

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Desire and deserve are not interchangeable terms, despite the fact that modern American use them as such.  What you desire may not be what you deserve and what you deserve may not be what you desire.

If you believe you deserve something what have you done to earn it?  The trouble with the millennial crowd is that they all believe they deserve everything that they desire just because they want it.

Episode Transcription


♫ Trenches by Pop Evil ♫


Welcome to Morning Mindset. A daily dose of practical wit and wisdom with a professional educator & trainer, Amazon best selling author, United States Marine, Television and Radio host, Paul G. Markel. Each episode will focus on positive and productive ways to strengthen your mindset, and help you improve your relationships, career goals, and overall well-being. Please welcome your host; Paul G. Markel.

*Professor Paul*

Hello, welcome back to Morning Mindset with your host Paul Markel which is me! Ugh, how many of you out there are moms or dads, or how many of you are supervisors, or maybe you’re bosses, maybe you have employees. Maybe you are dealing with the up 7 coming millennial crowd, and how many of them think they deserve everything they desire, just because they want it? Today we’re going to be talking about Deserve or Desire, or Desire or Deserve, and are they interchangeable words?

Alright and, *laughs* I know many of you are already nodding your heads and you’re like “Yep Paul, I’ve been there, I’ve done that, I dig what you’re squealing”, but let’s dive into it. Desire and Deserve are not interchangeable terms, despite what your millennial children or teenage children think. Just because the American Modern Culture, the Modern American Culture uses the terms “Desire” and “Deserve” doesn’t necessarily mean they’re interchangeable. What you Desire may not be what you Deserve, and what you Deserve may not be what you Desire.

So be careful what you ask for. When you’re dealing with your children, how many times have your children said they deserve something, or they feel they deserve something, and why? Why is that? Is it because they’ve earned it, because they’ve done anything to earn that thing? Or is it just because they want it? How many times in your life have you felt that you deserved Blank. “I deserve a promotion” okay, do you really Deserve a promotion or do you Desire the promotion? Now desiring a promotion or a pay raise doesn’t necessarily mean you do. Now you might, but before you walk into your boss’ or your supervisor’s office and demand a raise or demand a promotion, because you think you deserve it, you might want to do a little bit of a Gut-Check and say “Hey, do I legitimately Deserve a pay raise? Or is it something I desire because hey, everyone wants more money right? Everyone wants more money, and I Desire that so I Deserve it.”

People in our modern culture have fallen into this trap where they believe, and let’s face it. The central Federal Government and the State Governments and Uuuuugh, shall we say the “Big Media Complex”, they are very, very good at convincing people that if they Desire something, that means they deserve it. That is essentially how the entire political platform, the entire Democrat Political Platform is built on “If you desire it, you deserve it! You desire a mobile phone? Well you deserve to have a mobile phone. It doesn’t matter if you’ve gone out and earned enough money to buy one. If you desire one, heck you deserve it. We’ll take money from other people and we’ll put it in a great big pool, and we’ll buy you a mobile phone. Not because you deserve it, but because you want [it].”

There’s an entire political party that has made its platform giving people what they want. Whatever it is they say they want. Doesn’t matter whether they’ve earned it, doesn’t matter whether they worked for it, doesn’t matter whether they need it. They desire it, therefore they deserve it. But when it comes to promotions, when it comes to pay raises, and so forth. If you have children, you may want your children to listen to this episode of Morning Mindset, because the world always has a way of balancing itself out. You can’t fight nature, you can try, we always try. Humans always try to fight human nature, constantly we fight against human nature or we try to fight against nature in general, and most of the time we lose.

One of those ways is, we constantly strive for things, things we wants. Sometimes what you deserve isn’t a reward, sometimes it’s punishment. Sometimes what you desire is not actually what you Need, and when we come to that crossroad in our life where we think, we start believing that we deserve this or that, because we desire it. We’ve talked previously on this show about, we talked about Education, we talked about Training, we talked about Knowledge and Experience, we talked about ways of earning things. Of actually working a little bit harder, of going through the trouble of trying to educate yourself, to make yourself a more valuable employee.

Now if you’ve gone out and actually taken steps to make yourself a better employee, to make yourself more valuable, then you probably do deserve greater compensation. You generally would deserve that, if you went through all the steps, for instance. Wherever it is you work, for you to become a supervisor, you have to meet these steps. Meet these criteria. Did you go through all those criteria, or did you skip over a few of them because you thought they were stupid and pointless, but you still want the promotion anyway. Now when people come to you and say “I deserve blankity, blank-blank.” You sit them down and say “Okay, why is it exactly that you deserve more money, or deserve more responsibility?”

You go back to the old testimate of the bible and the story of the talents, and the story of the servants, and if they used their talents in a wise fashion. If you go back and you went to sunday school probably. A businessman went on a journey and he have X number of talents to different servants, and when he came back he asked the servants what they did with the talents. What they were referring to at the time, not physical talents, they were talking about money. But think of talents as money and an investment, and one servant said “I took your money and I invested it and this is what I got in return.”

He says “Well done good and faithful servant, because you have been, well you have been faithful with small responsibilities, I’ll give you bigger responsibilities.” Well another servant say “Well I invested blank and this what I got” and he said “Well done good and faithful servant, you invested your talents wisely, I’m going to give you more responsibility, more money, here you go.” And another one said “Well I knew you were greedy, so I took it and hid it under a rock, so here you go. Here’s your original talent back.” He said, essentially, “Be gone from me, you have not been responsible for even the smallest thing, so therefore everything you have I will take away from you.”

So when it comes to did you desire or did you deserve, when you talk to your children, when you talk to maybe your employees, those who work for you, maybe it’s people you coach, could be a coach. Somebody on your team, one of the kids on the team thinks he should be the team captain, or a co-captain or whatever, and they really believe that they deserve it. That’s when you say “Well, what have you done to deserve this? Simply desiring something, does not mean you deserve it.” Yes indeed, so if you want to be responsible for greater things, if you want to have more responsibility, if you want to have more money, you have to be responsible for more smaller things.

You know, I’m not here to preach the old testament to you, but it’s a very good story, it’s illustrative, and there are a lot of stories in the bible that are. So ladies & gentlemen, this is what I’ll leave you with today, before you sit down and decide that you deserve blank, or before you allow someone to tell you that they deserve, whatever it happens to be. Money, a new car, a phone. How many of you have teenagers that you believe deserve a brand new phone! That’s when you say “Okay, you Desire a new phone, but what have you done to earn it?”

This is the really real world here. In the really real world, we don’t get things just because we want them, and the lesson for today is; Desire and Deserve are not interchangeable. Alright thank you for joining us for today’s Morning Mindset, I hope you’re getting your Mind right with all that we have to offer. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed this and shared it, and thank you to everyone who has gone to Amazon, because as you know, as you’ve heard previously, all of my books are available on paperback or Kindle as Kindle Versions, so you can take them anywhere you want to go on your iPad or iPhone or whatever it is that you like. I’ll talk to ya again, real soon.


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